14 December 2007

i. tell. ya.

I'M DONE WITH FINALS!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!! it looks like i have an "a" semester in the bag, even with my nervousness inducing presentation i had to give last night. it went pretty well, though i fumbled a few spots. luckily, i have no trouble laughing at myself. :)

i'm still sicky, adding to my out-of-pocket status, but i FINALLY found something that works. elderberry juice concentrate and virastop. i'm on the mend. i wish i would have started these things at the beginning! surgeries are still postponed. i was hoping to have this all finished by the new year, but, no dice. and so it goes...

on top of the sick-induced brain fuzziness of the past 6 weeks, i was hit with a different kind of whopper last week. a school friend that i grew up with died suddenly from an aneurysm. she was 34. she had two small children. she got in her car, started to drive, and was gone. just like that. just. like. that. i had recently reconnected with her through myspace and a few days before we were talking about hooking up the next time i was in town to see my parents. i'm still in disbelief.

she had a profound affect on me, at a very young age. i've always carried her with me, all of those times i felt inadequate - she was there - reminding me to never let anyone have that sort of power over me . she wasn't like anyone else i ever knew. she was "different" - even when we were small. and she embraced it. while i wasted so many years of high school trying to fit in somewhere, anywhere... i still can't talk about this, the tears still keep coming. my grrrl robin wrote something about monica. she says it in a way i just can't. not yet. she's the writer.

has someone ever affected you this way? tell them. now. this all could end. just. like. that.

i have nothing insightful or smart to say. my brain is still a bit frazzled.

and in the spirit of strength - i did see this video today that brought me to tears. if you didn't get it from me via email, here it is. alix. olson. rocks.

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