31 July 2006

so today

when i woke up, i decided that my blog posting would be one closer to home, less "political." whatever that means. it would be about how i'm in my final week of school before i'am officially and fully edumacated and how i'm scrambling to finish papers and projects. it would be about the Silly Crazy Climbing Monkey bebe and our Too Hot To Go Outside Indoor Adventures. and lo and behold, this is what is weighing on my mind instead.

the bebe rose and shone at 7 am, raring to go. i'm questioning my giving up caffeine 3 years ago. hearing the familiar rumble bumble of the trash pick up, i head out the door to fetch our recycleables bin. right in front of our driveway, on the street, lays a familiar kitty. not 'our' kitty, but one that i've seen and talked to daily since her birth a year or so ago. she was wild, but never ventured far. she met her fate, thanks to a pre-occupied driver that most likely wasn't paying attention. or she darted out in front of him. who knows.

she looked to be in pretty bad shape and her run in with the car clearly had killed her. i thought about what i should do. instinctually, i wanted to go get her - but i didn't know where to put her. burying her in our yard isn't an option, unless we would want to see her again after the dogs dug her up. not to mention, i'm super squimish, and i don't know that i could've physically done it. there was blood. there was brain. i could see that part of her head had been smashed. i opt instead to call animal control, who assures me that "someone will be right out."

a few hours later, bebe and i are playing in the front room. i glance out the window. she is still there, though it looks as if another car has furthered the bodily damage. her fur is pulled back from her body now and there is more blood. i feel tears welling up, my stomach begins turning again. i scold myself for being ridiculous about a stray, but i can't help it.

as the day progresses, more cars run her clean over and still no animal control. i don't want to look anymore, but i can't stop myself. i feel sick all day long.

around four i decide to call again, as i'm sure they will soon be heading home for the day - only to be told that i shouldn't have called animal control, but Dead Animals. apparently these departments aren't one and the same. they even have their own listing in the book. it says Dead Animals. just so you know. i ask animal control if i need to call Dead Animals, and she tells me no - that she'll do it. and what's my address?

no Dead Animals Patrol ever showed.

i guess everything truly is political after all.

beings how it is now 9:46 pm - i don't think they're going to make it. and judging from what is left of the kitty, they wouldn't have anything to pick up if they did.

that kitty was roaming about, just this morning. most likely taking inventory of food thrown out in the garbage, ripping open a bag here and there for a nibble. stalking birds. getting territoriall with the other kitties. and now, she is literally a large stain in the middle of the street. that's it. i'm certain there may be some neighbors that would celebrate her demise as our 'hood is Stray Cat Breeding Central, but i feel really sad. even a little empty. i watched her, throughout the day, get further and further ground into the asphalt. and it just doesn't seem right. it doesn't seem fair. she has been simply erased. it is too easy in this world, to just simply be erased. it is as if she was never even here. so here i'am writing about her. a memorial of sorts. because no living being with a heart and a brain and breath should ever just be erased.


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